|
Mark Leidner
MY CORVETTE
I’m driving a Corvette now.
Just thought I’d let you know.
I don’t feel like calling people
so that’s why I’m writing this.
If you see anyone who knows me
who hasn’t read this yet
let them know I drive a Corvette.
I just want to make sure
everybody who knows me knows
because I think it’s funny,
me driving a Corvette. Hell
I never would’ve predicted that.
Not in a million years.
And I think it might amuse some people
especially those who know me well—
the better they know me
the more amused they’ll be.
So seriously
if you see anyone who knows me
especially if we go way back
tell them I drive a Corvette now.
It doesn’t have to be a big deal.
Just wait for a lull in the conversation
and slip it in.
I was going to put a picture of it here
but my digital camera got destroyed
so here is a picture of another Corvette.
It’s just a random Corvette off the internet.
You should probably right-click on it
and make your desktop
to help you remember to tell everyone
what car I drive now.
If I ever get my digital camera fixed
I’ll take a picture of my real Corvette
so you can change your desktop background
to that new picture then,
but don’t hold your breath.
My digital camera is in, literally, a thousand pieces
because a semi ran over it.
I was trying to take a picture
from the street, of myself in the driveway
leaning up against my Corvette.
I put the camera in the middle of the street,
set up the shot, then pressed the time-delay
shutter and ran back to the driveway
to lean against my Corvette—
but that’s when the semi came around the corner
going a little too fast, and its wheels
ran right over the tiny camera
which crushed it.
I spent the rest of the afternoon
picking camera pieces out of the asphalt
and got real depressed—
but then I remembered the Corvette I still had
and looked up.
There it was in the driveway
still mine, still shining
like nothing had happened.
|
